It’s not a happy birthday
It's never so been
It’s a day for grief and mourning
At everything in between
A day for sorrow not laughter
A day for giving thanks
A day for being sober
Remembering Omnipotence
A day for lamentation
For numbering my days
For being like Moses
The grass which soon thus fades
When do I celebrate you say
I do too much already
Of this thinking and reflection
Being serious and too heady
I feel it deeply in my soul
This is not about my brain
I celebrate every day
Every moment I am praying
I feel this overwhelming
In my heart I cannot lie
It’s hard to be pretending
If you’ve had something in you die
I’m all for fun and laughter
Please go ahead with joy
And because I’m turning forty
I won’t act like I’m some toy
In pain I was conceived
In pain was given birth
In pain I go on towards the grave
Albeit with lots of myrrh
And I do laugh and celebrate
Each of God’s good gifts
I feel mirth often too
My kids and nature’s lifts
But today I just ain’t in the mood
As most birthdays often go
And I will go ahead and be very sad
Like a geyser you just don't know
